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Bai Traditional Wedding  by Precious Diamond
In Bai tradition, the wedding ceremony usually takes place six
months to a year after the prospective groom initially proposes.
On the actual wedding day, guests will arrive for a mid-morning lunch, zǎo fàn (早饭), at about 11:00 am. The bride is still dressed in her normal day’s clothes when her guests arrive. She greets and serves food to them ‘till the arrival of the groom.

She then adjourns to the upper room of her parents’ home, while the groom tries to ask for her permission to take her to his home. He has to do so three or four times from about noon to about 3:00 pm.

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The bride’s new clothes displayed before the ancestral altar.


White Rice
The couple opens a wine bottle to fulfill their friends’ demands.

White Rice
Also as part of the demands, a groom transports the bride in a wheelbarrow.

Meanwhile, the bride’s close friends and relatives gather at the upper room, where a good friend starts grooming her up. By this time, she would have exhausted her excuses of not leaving her parents’ home and so the groom gives one last plea and she has no choice but to agree. This is when they start dressing her in her new clothes and shoes. Prior to this, her new clothes and shoes were laid on the floor in front of her ancestors’ altar for guests to view.

After she has put on her wedding dress (a red jacket matched with a red skirt) and a pair of calf length boots, the groom comes to claim his bride and they both kneel in front of the ancestors’ altar to pay their respects. Then, they go downstairs to where all the elders of their family are seated. This is where they have to kneel and serve tea to each of these elders.

This is often the most emotional time for the bride as the moment draws near for her to leave her parents’ home. She has to cry to show her gratefulness to her parents and a reluctance to leave them. Such is a good daughter! Finally, when tea is served to all the elders in her community, she prepares to leave her home. Prior to their leaving, the bride’s dowry will leave first with the movers. Her dowry consists of new bedding; cupboards; television; and all other basic household stuff.

As the newly wed couple exits the bride’s house, the wedding party will fire crackers to send them off with good luck. They continue to do so at different points of their journey as they walk to the groom’s house. Along the way, close friends will be there to tease them with all sorts of demands. Both the bride and groom are at their mercy and if they don’t comply, the wedding party stalls and will only move on when they fulfill the demands.

Eventually, the wedding party and all the guests arrive to the groom’s home! The groom will be asked to carry his bride into his house. Then, the bride will invite her maids-of-honor and close friends to view the bridal room where the guests chat away scrutinizing wedding photos, drink tea, and munch on sunflower seeds, peanuts and candy. At a later time, they also serve a refreshing ginger drink boiled with some raw sugar.

Finally, they summon all the guests to the courtyard, where dinner is served around 5:00 pm. It is part of their practice to force the bridal couple to eat as much of the pork fat as possible, which they believe makes them strong and healthy! This is the final celebration and feasting before the guests start dispersing.

I’m told that in the Bai village tradition, the bride and groom’s close friends will stay with the bridal couple for their first night to keep them company. So, as I end my story, the story of a newly wed Bai couple begins! May they be blessed with all that it takes to establish a loving and secure family.